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SCALD LYRICS

Nematoid: specimen parts I-IV

"Nematoid: specimen parts I-IV" (1999 Demo)

1. Lower I
2. Recess
3. Paled
4. The Meat Perfect







1. Lower I

Waiting Waiting Waiting Waiting. Winding. Slowly chew apart the minutes of the day. Hiding behind the door. More sounds. More fear to burrow into my worry lined head. Breathing the same air over and over. Safe in here, you’ll never get me. Coiled in my box, in soil, not a trap, asylum. Not buried alive, buried to live. Away from the bad, far from the mad. But if they unearth me, I’ll turn their faces, lathe cuts and grazes. Hurt them as their intent. Alone in me in a world of empty. Distance and hurtings, solitary pacings. Locomotivation is self-preservation. The only way is alone. Sending children to trick Jack from his box, I fit more locks. I have no kin. None left like me. I see through cracks. Pretending false faces at the door. Please send no more. The next one I down and drag underground. With happy scissors toothless laugh, there are always new lows.




2. Recess

Do you wonder why I’m scratching the walls? Finger breaking relieves the tedium. Is bleeding a strange therapy, to prepare for self hate recovery? Any reason I had long flushed away piss-cleansed for confrontation. Mediating time has passed. This is no place for moderation. My self-destructive determination, just a fucking mental conflagration. And you’re still here with that fucking look, to hold me in restless arms, with no answers. Understand me? Be me? Feel me? Sleep in a spinning bed, with a bruising head. You may come close to my irritation. Snap off your eyelids. Don a mask of flies. See no end to this. See only red. Kiss my scars, they’ll still be there next time.




3. Paled

I look down at you and sense your peace. I want to join you in your dream, just to escape my own. I sleep in a cynic’s shifting grey. Still I never want to wake, escape the biting reality, to have the shapeless illusion break. To realise again how I have failed you. But what use would I be to you in your dreaming innocence? Too long corrupted by time. I could never cleanse my mind, to fly with you in a clean sky. A thousand colours pale beside you. Depression comes from the most beautiful things. To realise myself for what I have become. Tears of sadness are tears of knowing that the gift of life is a gift of pain.




4. The Meat Perfect

 


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